


catacombs

by moth_writes



Series: smiling fate [18]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Carry On Countdown (Simon Snow), Getting Together, M/M, Misunderstandings, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Doesn't Get Kidnapped by Numpties, Watford Eighth Year
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:34:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28037751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moth_writes/pseuds/moth_writes
Summary: Simon and Baz at a party. Things spiral.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: smiling fate [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2026844
Comments: 3
Kudos: 67
Collections: Carry On Countdown 2020





	catacombs

**Author's Note:**

> Done for the Carry On Countdown Day 19: Misunderstanding

SIMON

Agatha and I break up two weeks into November. 

I knew it would happen. She’s been distant for months now, and I didn’t miss her like that-like a girlfriend-over summer.

We drew it out too long. We should have broken up as soon as we came back. 

We should’ve broken up before summer break, honestly. 

We’re better off as friends. I didn't realize how strained we’d been until after, when the relief set in.

I felt bad at first-shouldn’t I have been more upset, breaking up with my girlfriend? I wasn’t, though, and neither was Agatha. I know it was the right choice.

But now I have to go to the Winter Ball, and I don’t have a date.

The Winter Ball is an Eighth Years only thing. There’s alcohol and dancing and it lasts well into the night. It’s two days before break, and we get those days off too.

It’s not mandatory. I don’t technically have to go.

I do, though, because I’m the bloody Chosen One and I have to make an appearance at everything. And I have to bring a date, too, though I don’t fully know why. Appearances, I guess.

Penny and Micah broke up last summer. Just weren’t right anymore, she said, but I know she’s upset about it. She’s moping, and that’s a very un-Penny like activity.

I ask her on a whim. Neither of us have dates, so we should go as friends and enjoy being single. She agrees and tells me she’ll handle the clothes.

I sigh. Thank fuck, I really didn’t want to.

…

The night of the Ball Baz takes even longer in the bathroom than normal.

He knows what he’s doing, though. I’ll admit that much-he looks fit as hell when he comes out, all suited up with his hair loose around his face.

I think-is that...I squint a bit and yes, he _is_ wearing eyeliner. Not a lot, but enough to really bring his eyes out.

I don’t think about the burning in my stomach. I’m probably just nervous.

“Who’re you going with?” I blurt, then add “Thought none of the girls here were good enough for your posh arse.” I hoped it would save me, but it just comes out more mean and weird than anything.

I’m always mean to Baz, though, so I don’t much care.

“They are,” he drawls and smirks. Then he sighs, and he looks almost annoyed. “I’ll be third-wheeling Dev and Niall all night instead.”

“They’re together?” I ask. They have been rather close lately, but not very different form how they usually are.

Well. I only have what I see from across classrooms and the dining hall to go on, and most of the time I was looking in their direction it was at Baz. I wouldn’t be surprised if I hadn’t noticed.

Baz looks at me like I’m an idiot. “They’ve been dating since fourth year, Snow.”

I blink. I didn’t think it would be that long. How have I not noticed?

It’s definitely Baz’s fault, I think. I always see less when he’s around.

“Which poor girl have you decided to drag around tonight, Snow? Not Wellbelove, of course, since she dumped your sorry arse.” Baz drawls. It’s condescending and nasty and my blood almost boils.

“Penny and I are going as friends,” I tell him. It’s my last bit of patience, and I think he knows because he just sneers and leaves.

I watch the door shut behind him. 

I check the clock-five minutes until I have to meet Penny. I was waiting for Baz to get out of the bathroom, and now I’ll have to hurry.

_Fuck_.

…

I want to leave. 

But it’s only been half an hour, and I can’t. Penny, leaning against the wall next to me, looks just as miserable. 

I hold out my hand and she gives me her empty cup. At least the food table is well stocked. There’s a plate of sour cherry scones piled high right in the center, and I’ve already helped myself to a few.

I'm standing there, with Penny’s cup in one hand and a half-ate scone in the other when a tap on my shoulder surprises me. 

I turn. It’s a girl I vaguely recognize, with red hair and grey eyes. I think her name starts with an _E_ -Elizabeth? Eliza?

No, I remember when she smiles at me. Elspeth. She’s on the lacrosse team with Agatha.

“Hi, Simon,” she says.

“‘Lo,” I mutter and take another bite out of my scone. It’s rude and I know it, but I don’t really want to talk to anyone.

It doesn’t seem to faze her, though. She just steps a little closer and smiles, twining a piece of hair around her fingers.

“I like your pin,” I offer. I feel bad-I’m the Mage’s Heir, I have to be at least a little polite at parties.

And I really do like her pin. It’s blue and pink and purple striped, and covered in some sort of shiny glaze. Her whole jacket’s covered in pins, actually, and little patches sewn on.

I didn’t know you could wear denim jackets and sneakers with a dress. She looks nice, though.

She looks surprised. I don’t know why, but then she smiles brighter and I figure it’s fine. She leans in closer, and I think she’s going to put her hand on my arm but she reaches behind me and grabs a cup instead.

I stumble back and almost spill Penny’s drink. I’m trying to brush the crumbs from my scone off my shirt and listen to Elspeth talk when I catch sight of Baz.

He’s standing a couple meters away, holding three cups while Dev and Niall snog next to him. He looks annoyed, and I guess it’s probably because he’s been turned into a cup holder.

He’s glaring at me. A real murderous one too, so mean and angry I start to imagine holes boring through me.

I glare back. He sneers and glances away-oh. He’s looking at Elspeth. 

Does he like her?

I’ve never seen Baz with a girl. Maybe this is why. 

I think he likes Elspeth. Like, _like_ likes.

I’m feeling mean and nasty and I know I’ll feel bad about it later, but I lean closer to Elspeth and act interested in what she’s saying. I keep glancing at Baz, and he just looks madder and madder.

I let her put her hand on my arm and laugh. I’ve actually started getting involved in the conversation, and we’ve moved on to holiday plans. She’s going to visit family in France, she says, and when she starts telling me about the food there I almost make her promise to bring some back for me.

Then a hand clamps around my shoulder, cold and tight. I turn, and it’s Baz.

Of course it’s Baz. I growl a bit, then throw a quick _sorry_ to Elspeth.

Baz drags me out of the dining hall and into the corridor. I let him mostly because I’m curious, but I’ve also had a couple drinks already and I’m itching for a fight.

As soon as the door closes he whirls around and faces me. He sneers, though it’s closer to a snarl, and pushes me. I take a step backwards. 

I clench my fists and grit my teeth and resist the urge to throw a punch. I can fight back, but I promised Penny I wouldn’t start any with Baz this year, and I want that to last until at least after break.

“Not even a month away from Wellbelove and you’re already onto another girl?” he hisses. I frown and narrow my eyes at him.

I thought he was upset about Elspeth. But now he’s bringing up Agatha, and. Is he upset over her? Does he think I’m hurting Agatha?

“What?” I say, and I’m almost too confused to be angry. “Agatha? I thought you were mad about Elspeth.”

“Why would I be mad about Elspeth?” he sneers. “I’m simply disgusted by your willingness to hook up immediately after leaving your girlfriend of three years.”

“Oh,” I say, and now I _am_ more confused than angry. “You’re not mad I was talking to Elspeth?” I clarify. Baz sighs and pinches the too-high bridge of his nose.

“ _No_ , Snow. Elspeth _Grimm_ is my _cousin_ , you numpty.”

“How many cousins do you have?” I blurt.

“Four. I have an aunt and two uncles on my father’s side.”

“That’s a lot of family.”

“Not really.”

“Oh,” I say. I don’t know how big families usually are. I know Penny only has one cousin, though, from her dad’s side.

“If that’s it,” I say and turn on my heel. I don’t need to listen to Baz yell at me, especially because I was mostly only talking to Elspeth to make him mad.

He growls behind me but doesn’t say anything.

I need a drink. A _strong_ drink.

…

I laugh and throw my arm over Penny’s shoulder.

We’re talking about-something, I don’t know-but I’m happy and giggly. Whatever alcohol they put in the punch is having a much better effect than the cheap beers and whiskey I usually drink.

She laughs too, much louder than I’ve heard before. I squeeze her shoulder, and she rests her head on mine.

“I’m going to get more drinks,” I say. It’s slurred, but I don’t care. Fuck Elocution. “And food. Did you see the scones? And the biscuits?”

“Yes, Simon,” Penny says and she sounds amused. “You’ve told me nine times already.”

I nod. Good, she deserves to know. As many times as possible.

The scones are really fucking amazing.

I get to the table and pick up another scone. The sour cherry are gone, but there’s cranberry orange and I like those too.

I stuff the one into my mouth and grab another, then fill my cup with more punch. I’ve only had two, and I’m starting to feel it.

I’ll switch to water or soda after this, I tell myself. I’ve been hungover before, and it’s not fun.

I’m about to get another cup for Penny when movement near the door catches my eye. Everybody’s moving, of course, but almost all of them are gathered in the open space in the middle of the room and at the far walls. The furthest I’ve seen anybody come this way in ages is for the food tables.

And it’s Baz. 

If it were anyone else, I’d assume they just want some fresh air and move on. But this is Baz, and he _must_ be plotting something, because he always is.

I follow.

I’m only buzzed, and I still have control over myself. I follow him quietly down the halls and through the entrance of the Catacombs.

I know he can hear me. He’s a vampire, with super senses and shit. He’s letting me follow him.

It only adds to my suspicion.

Baz leads me down and down, until we’re at a small room with candles built into tiny alcoves in the wall.

Baz points at the candles one by one, and one by one they flare to life. They’re burning, and Baz doesn’t stop until the chamber is filled with flickering light.

I watch him sit against the wall, right next to the plaque. His eyes close, and his head tilts back to rest against the wall.

“What, Snow?” He says flatly, and I almost jump. He doesn’t look, just stays with his head back and his knees drawn up.

I sit too, next to him. Just out of arm’s reach. “Where are we?” I ask. I keep my voice quiet. I think it would feel disrespectful, somehow, to yell here. Fight too, maybe.

“My mother’s tomb.”

“Oh,” I say. He sounds resigned to it, and sad, and I don’t know what to say. I don’t speak.

I was so ready to fight him, to follow him down and confront him. To figure out what he’s plotting.

I don’t think he’s plotting.

I think he’s just a boy, a boy visiting his mother’s tomb, and.

And.

I don’t know. And what? He isn’t my enemy here. I don’t think he is, anyway.

What does that make us? Roommates? Classmates?

Not friends, I think, and it makes me sadder than I thought it would. Roommates are supposed to be your best friends, your brothers. 

We didn’t get that.

It’s too late now, I think. I don’t know how that makes me feel. Sad, maybe. Disappointed.

“Do you think we could have been friends?” I ask. 

“Maybe,” he says. “If things were different.”

“Would you have wanted to be?”

Baz hesitates, then sighs. “Yes. I think so.”

“It’s too late, isn’t it.”

“Only for what could have been,” he says, and smiles wryly. “It’s for the best. We would’ve wrecked this world.”

I hum and think about that. I don’t know if he’s right, but the words strike something in me anyway.

“You’ve already wrecked me,” he whispers. I look at him. He’s staring at me now, resting his cheek on his knees and messing idly with his shoelaces. His eyes are open and he’s looking at me.

I don’t know what I see in his gaze. Something melancholy, or sad, or regretful.

“You’ve wrecked me too,” I whisper back and the words feel right in my mouth. Like a spell, or like I was supposed to say them.

I hold out my hand. He regards it, then reaches out slowly. He’s cold, so cold, and I cup his hand in both of mine and bring it to my mouth. I blow warm air over his skin and he sighs, eyes closing.

“I’ll miss you, I think,” I tell him. I’m still whispering. It feels better for this.

“And I you, Snow.”

“Simon.”

“Simon.”

I’m still holding his hand. He’s still letting me. We lapse into silence.

“I like this better than fighting,” I say, and it feels like a confession.

“Me too,” he tells me.

“Baz,” I say and he looks at me, eyes blinking wide. It’s been dawning on me slowly throughout this conversation-through this year, really-and I have a name to go with it now. “I think I’m in love with you. Maybe. A little.” I pause. “A lot.”

“Oh,” Baz says, and it’s the least eloquent I’ve ever heard him. He’s staring, and I can’t place the look on his face. 

“Is that okay?”

Baz shifts, leaning closer and putting his head on my shoulder-slowly, all of it, like he’s not sure he’s allowed to. “Yes. I… As it stands, Simon, I happen to be in love with you as well. A little. A lot.”

I pull back a bit to look at him. He looks unsure. I don’t like it. “I think that’s the first time I’ve ever heard you talk about your feelings,” I joke. Baz smiles, soft and small and something I’ve never seen before.

He hums. “Maybe you just weren’t listening.”

I laugh, and so does he, even though it wasn’t really funny. It’s the relief, I think, relief and love and something warm in my chest.

“How long?” I ask.

“How long for you?” Baz counters.

“I started realizing it this year,” I say. “But maybe I’ve loved you for a long time. It feels like that. I just didn’t see it until now.”

“I realized fifth year,” he tells me, “when you came back all cut up and I stitched you back together. But I’ve loved you since I saw you.” His voice is raw, like the words are scraping his throat on their way up. I turn my head just enough to press my mouth to his forehead.

It’s strange. I’ve never kissed anybody anywhere except for on the lips, and only ever one person anyway. I like it.

That’s a long time, I think. I don’t say it aloud.

“What now?” I ask.

“What do you want?” Baz asks. 

I think for a moment, but the only answer I can come up with right now is-”You,” I tell him. I pause. “And maybe another scone.”

His shoulders shake slightly against mine as my joke lands.

We sit in silence. I should do something, but I feel strange. Dreamy, almost, like I’m not tethered to anything anymore.

“We should go back,” I say. I don’t want to move, though, and I’m not sure how this fragile thing between us will last outside of here.

I stand and stretch, then offer my hand to Baz. He takes it and I help him up.

He doesn’t let go. Neither do I.

I look at him and he stares back. 

“Hi,” I say.

“Hi,” he says.

“I want to kiss you,” I say.

And then _he_ kisses _me_.

It’s soft and chaste and there aren't any fireworks. It’s slight, too-cautious pressure and warmth in my chest.

I always thought our rivalry would end in flames and blood and death, but it ends like this: the soft press of lips and a feeling like coming home.

**Author's Note:**

> me, adding "hi" "hi" to yet another of my fics: uhh i don't have anything to add i just like it. it's like the italicized oh but in action
> 
> also, i expected this to be long. but not 2.8k long.
> 
> last thing: i just realized i should probably add a few tags, so i went to edit them, and. "Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Doesn't Get Kidnapped by Numpties" is a premade tag and i love this fandom
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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